Thursday 6 January 2011

Resolutions

I have been at my parents' house for almost two weeks already. In that time, I have completely abandoned the sensible Polish and French literature that I brought with me and made serious inroads into my Dad's Robert Harris collection instead. I have not studied all that much for my exam next week (it's like deja vu all over again), but I have downloaded an RTBF 1ère app onto my new iPod touch, so that counts as practice, right?

I have been up to London and back several times on the train and am thinking of buying shares in Connex South Eastern, not to mention Caffè Nero. 

I have done far more shopping than my tremulous bank balance allows (which isn't all that much).

I am more than ready to go back to Brussels and was already itching to get back to work by Sunday afternoon: there are only so many re-runs of Midsomer Murders* one can take in a week.

My sister is coping by baking. There has been copious brownie consumption in the Pinocorp household over the past 48 hours. Incidentally, six of us (excluding dogs) managed to get through a tin of Cadbury's Roses by Boxing Day evening (opened on Christmas Day, in case anyone was still feeling peckish after lunch). That's nearly a kilo. Is that bad? Is anyone else's family that gluttonous?

To continue my ever-deeper slide down the literary slope, I ransacked the bookcase in my old bedroom and came up with a copy of Bridget Jones' Diary, bought when I was sixteen and had absolutely no idea what any of it was about. It now seems scarily, prophetically accurate and I hardly dare to turn the pages for fear of reading my life in minute detail on the next leaf. Sadly, my parents have yet to introduce me to any top human rights lawyers, but one can always live in hope. In future, when reading, I resolve to stay firmly away from romantic comedies and safely in the action/crime thriller zone, to prevent maudlin before bedtime (what is the verb form of 'maudlin'? Maudlin-in'?).

Ugh. Resolutions.

I Will Not:

- even pretend to give up drinking as this will only result in a terrible binge some time like next weekend and a lot of guilt. 
- buy a pair of scales. My jeans still fit (even after washing), so it can't be that bad.
- go near a boy ever again because they are all emotionally immature and a big waste of precious time, energy and emotional investment.
- go out with friends who coerce teenagers (well, more or less) into taking my phone number by lying about my real age to the tune of about seven years and get us all into trouble for not leaving the pub when it's clearly closing time already
- beat myself up over any of the following: 
  • drinking too much; 
  • eating too much; 
  • not eating enough; 
  • being single and alone and over the hill and unloved and unattractive and generally an utterly unappealing old hag;
  • not acting my age
  • f*cking up at work
  • not beating myself up enough for f*cking up at work, thus demonstrating lack of gravitas in professional context
I Will:

- cook regularly, like at least twice a week, with real vegetables and everything.
- stop wasting time on Facebook
- learn all the jazz scales, chord progressions and other technical piano thingies, since I now have all this free time as a single unattractive old hag, and become brilliant - albeit single and unattractive - jazz pianist (this has been my resolution for about the past ten years)
- start a turkey-baster fund, in case of emergency to be used by 2017 at the latest
- travel and do stuff outdoors and try to enjoy life in general
- buy some furniture already
- talk to people more and stop looking at the ground
- go to Italy more often because I love it but always forget how much
- speak Polish to strangers (who actually are Polish, obviously)
- write more on the blog (and possibly also off the blog)
- sort out my accounts, since I am a highly streamlined and professional twenty-first century businesswoman
- lie about my age: the teenager looked (almost) convinced
- fall in love. Probably with a puppy.


*That's Inspecteur Barnaby to all you francophonic types.


19 comments:

Anonymous said...

speak Polish to strangers (who actually are Polish, obviously)

How often do you do this? What is the reaction? How do you recognise them? Do they not think you are a crazy stalker? How good is your Polish honestly, A1 etc?

pinolona said...

Not actual strangers obviously, I mean Polish people like the lady in the Polish shop, Polish colleagues, people I meet at parties. I do it fairly often but not always because shyness tends to prevail. The reaction depends: some people are surprised and pleased to get to speak their native language for a change, some think it's cute in a sort of patronising way and some insist on speaking English because it's 'easier' - which it certainly is for me...

No, they don't think I'm a crazy stalker, because I only do it under appropriate circumstances. However, I have a colleague who speaks Nepali and literally accosts people on the street, and they really, genuinely don't mind (but I suspect his Nepali is much better than my Polish, and I think the culture is more open to interaction with strangers, and also it's much more surprising to meet a European who speaks an Oriental language so they're probably very curious).

A1-C2 levels tend to be risky because they can be subjective (based on self-assessment or that of only one other person). In July, when I was studying in Krakow, my Polish teacher rated my comprehension (reading and listening) as about C1 and my speaking as about B2, but I would say my speaking has dropped a level since then because I haven't been to Poland for a few months. I never write in Polish unless I absolutely have to and even then it's only texts and facebook. If I have to write a formal email, I get a Polish friend to check (and sometimes even to (re)write it) for me...

Anonymous said...

Hi Pinolona, super answer thanks, it was worthy of a blog entry all on its own.

I do it fairly often but not always because shyness tends to prevail.

When you don't always speak Polish with Poles do you let them know that you understand what they are saying or do you say nothing, let them continue and sometimes hear something unpleasant about yourself? I suppose this applys to any language really.

No, they don't think I'm a crazy stalker, because I only do it under appropriate circumstances.

What is your rule of thumb for appropriate circumstances considering that many Poles speak good English? I get it that you wouldn't speak Polish with someone who you only have contact with for a few minutes and will never see again.

Did you do any kind of a test in Polish in Poland that would give you a cert. saying that you are this good etc.? Do you have plans to do one?

Anonymous said...

Hi Pinolona, super answer thanks, it was worthy of a blog entry all on its own.

I do it fairly often but not always because shyness tends to prevail.

When you don't always speak Polish with Poles do you let them know that you understand what they are saying or do you say nothing, let them continue and sometimes hear something unpleasant about yourself? I suppose this applys to any language really.

No, they don't think I'm a crazy stalker, because I only do it under appropriate circumstances.

What is your rule of thumb for appropriate circumstances considering that many Poles speak good English? I get it that you wouldn't speak Polish with someone who you only have contact with for a few minutes and will never see again.

Did you do any kind of a test in Polish in Poland that would give you a cert. saying that you are this good etc.? Do you have plans to do one?

Michael Dembinski said...

I wish you all the best in 2011. Above all, that you find that special someone to fill that aching void.

Anonymous said...

Cześć Michał D, gdzie pracujesz? Hallmark?

pinolona said...

Anon: about the shyness: generally it's when I'm introduced to someone Polish or if I meet them in another situation - if I'm feeling shy I'll simply speak in English and be lazy. In Brussels, there's always a mix of different nationalities so the lingua franca tends to be English or French, so I don't end up in situations where people are speaking Polish without realising that I understand them.

As for appropriate circumstances, I mean I won't go up to someone on the metro if I hear them speaking on the phone in Polish, but I will talk to people I meet at parties (vodka helps!) and also for example if I go into the Polish shop, I'll speak in Polish and not French (but I think that's normal isn't it?)

Michael, thanks for the good wishes! And the same to you: hope you have a successful and happy 2011!

Anon the second: now now, no attacking of fellow commentators on my blog please! Although I agree that Hallmark has a lot to answer for in terms of our modern love-myth...

Michael Dembinski said...

It is not a myth, nor is it modern:) (just take a peek into the classics).

"You, me, them - everybody -
Everybody, needs somebody to love"

Michael Dembinski said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

anon1: I think that it is normal to speak Polish in a Polish shop as generally they will say something in Polish when you enter unless they know you don't speak polish already.

pinolona said...

yeah, but bear in mind that a lot of the classics were written in serial form with a view to selling newspapers!

The whole love at first sight thing is definitely a myth: I've been there, and it doesn't last, and once all the fuss has died down it doesn't mean anything. What is important is to find someone that you get on well with and care about, but unfortunately too many people have been conditioned by Disney and co into chasing a myth instead of committing to a real relationship.

Michael Dembinski said...

@ P:

The love-at-first-sight thing is oxytocin rush. It lasts longer in some than in others. But it's needed, it's the basis. On top of that natural biological reaction is required 1) respect and 2) trust. Once you have all three, you have something long-lasting.

And remember, only one in seven humans find that perfect soul mate.

pinolona said...

So what does that mean?! Do I accept that I'm not one of the one in seven and give up now?! Should I assume that I am one in seven and keep rejecting people until I find something perfect or die alone in an attic? What does it all mean?!

Anonymous said...

"And remember, only one in seven humans find that perfect soul mate."

Anon1: I think that a perfect soul mate doesn't exist. Maybe these 1 in 7 humans don't see the flaws in the other person or themselves or perfect is 100% at one moment in time when the survey was taken, the next time the survey is taken it will be a different 1 in 7 who have met the perfect soul mate.

Don't give up. I would say that you keep looking until you find someone that you do love and care for and they you, then you do your best to live the rest of your lives together happily.

Remember that you will never find perfect but you can find close to perfect. Striving for perfection in any area of life often leads to problems, perfection is ephemeral, elusive and time consuming.

Ask yourself, do you know any perfect males or females in the entire world or couples? If you don't know them by now then they musn't exist.

Perfection: If someone is perfect in one area they will be less than perfect in another because you don't have time to be perfect at everything. One can't spend lots of time with their partner building a great relationship while at the same time be extremely successful in business or work. It is about what you want and balance, if you want both you go for balance but if you want one more than the other then you go for what you want.

Anyway we have only one life so we must make the best of what we have and do what we would like to do.

Anonymous said...

anon 1: statistics are crap

Jeannie said...

And they say it'll come along when you least expect it--love, that is. So in the meantime, learn some jazz piano and do your own thing. Maybe during one of those activities you're meant to find Mr. Right. Good luck. ;)

Sara said...

I might adopt some of these. 'Stop wasting time on Facebook' would just about be the most life-changing resolution I can think of, if I actually stuck to it.

Good luck with the jazz! And happy 2011!

pinolona said...

Yeah, 'stop wasting time on Facebook' is really the big one here (already broken). I'm thinking of making myself some kind of primitive internet ration book!

Jeannie, thanks :) I s'pose you never know, and it's always good to have some kind of distraction.

the sister said...

The roses and the brownie were very bad! I went back on the Wiifit when I got home and I'd apparently gain 8lbs, and it made my Wii image fat! I feel very humiliated.
As for love at first sight, I don't believe it, lust maybe, but not love.
Btw would you really want Mum and Dad to pick out a husband for you?! Even if he was a human rights lawyer!
much love
x